Be eccentric now! No. 21.

My zombie alter ego!

Earlier this year I wrote an outraged response to an article in the Reader's Digest on the sorts of activities we should be doing as we get older. Reading this article I discovered that the activities that I currently engage in makes me fall into the 20-30 year old age group. At the same time I'd come a cross a list of 42 lessons to live by compiled by a woman in her 90's. I knew which set of rules I wanted  to follow!

I know that traditionally people take time at the end of the year to look back and reflect on how things have been and also make some decisions about any changes, if any, they want to make in the New Year. I've decided to get ahead of the game and do this now. Re-reading this blog I decided to review the list to see how I was doing in terms of following it. Some of the points are quite deep, like point 10 which says, ' make peace with your past so it won't screw up your present'. I've done quite a lot of that in the past few years but I think that this is one I'll probably be working on for the rest of my life! Unless my life suddenly becomes perfect and things stop going wrong or I stop making mistakes, that is. My mission statement says that  'I want to prove that life can still be an adventure'. This year has had its challenges, but that doesn't mean that I can't have a bit of fun.

This year we decided to treat ourselves and booked a cruise, 8 nights aboard the Grandeur of the Seas, sailing from Baltimore down to Nassau in the Bahamas, stopping at Port Canaveral on the way down and Key West on the way back. I was really ready for this holiday and pictured days sunning myself on deck when we were at sea or on some exotic beach with white sand with the clear blue waters of the ocean gently lapping the shore, lulling me into a sense of calm and tranquility. I should have known better!

As we set sail from Baltimore, my hubby and I watched from the warmth and shelter of the Viking Crown lounge as the entertainment crew and a few brave (or foolish), souls battled the cold and high wind trying to dance beside the pool. Never mind, I thought to myself, we're sailing south, things are bound to improve!

The next day proved to be no better. The temperature did improve slightly, but the winds were so strong it was safer and warmer to stay inside. Fortunately, one of the great things about cruising is that there is always something to do. So what did I, a 'lady of a certain age' choose to do? Play bingo? Try the quiz in the Schooner bar or even shop? Nope! I decided to attend a session where we could learn how to do a shortened version of Michael Jackson's 'Thriller' dance! Believe it or not, although there were a few young people, I wasn't the only person my era that attended this class, both male and female. If the young dancers of the ship's crew were dismayed by this, they certainly didn't show it. Over the week we had precisely 4 x 30 minute sessions gradually being taught the routine. The last session being at 2 pm on the last full day at sea. Then at 7.30 that evening we performed the dance to a packed audience of guests and crew in the Centrum of the ship.

For those of you unfamiliar with cruise ships. The Centrum is a bar/lounge area, in this case on deck 4 , which can be looked down upon from balconies from several decks above. An hour before the performance we gathered to have our hair teased, back combed and sprayed and our faces transformed to look like zombies. Despite our nervousness, there was a great sense of excitement as we looked out and watched as the Centrum and balconies above began to fill to capacity.

Then we were on! It was over really quickly. Apart from the entertainment crew and a couple of young ones who took part, it wasn't the most polished performance. But everyone received it as the bit of fun it was meant to be.  The audience went wild, clapping and cheering and as we left the dance floor people were congratulating us on our performance. For any Strictly fans reading this, it was more a 'Dave the Hairy Biker' entertaining performance, but everyone seemed to enjoy it. I know I did. No. 21 on the list I mentioned at the beginning of this blog is: 'Be eccentric'. Well what could be more eccentric than a 'lady of a certain age' learning and performing Michael Jackson's 'Thriller' dance on a cruise ship.

We seemed to spend the week at sea chasing or out running high winds which resulted in changes to the itinerary and the cancellation of a few excursions. One particular evening it was so choppy it was like being in a roller coaster laying in bed. No it wasn't the sunbathing, relaxing holiday I'd imagined, but it was certainly fun, with the Thriller performance being the highlight and a memory that in the future will always bring a smile to my face.

But no. 39 on the list really caught my eye! 'The best is yet to come!' I'll happily take that one on board. During the Captain's welcome aboard party, an announcement was made that one of the guests was celebrating his One Hundred and Second birthday! Now that's something to aspire too! Goodness knows what I'll be doing this time next year, but if I can believe this  and live  each day with this expectation,that the best is yet to come,  it should help get through the long cold days and dark night's of winter. Meanwhile if you fancy a laugh I've added the link to the Thriller performance on you tube. Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tEBAI0Tjxc&feature=youtu.be ©

A Cautionary tale

The Little Hedgehog.

It was the end of Summer. The nights were getting colder and longer. The trees were stretching their branches and shaking off their leaves as a snake rids itself of its old, dried skin ready for the new one to emerge. They did this in the knowledge that, after the long sleep of winter there would be new life to look forward too. The ground became blanketed with the reddish, yellowish, brownish carpet of leaves that rustled and crunched under the feet of the children as they gathered up sticks and fallen branches for the bonfire. They laughed and sang, excited at the prospect of the glowing fire and their mouths watered in anticipation of the marshmallows that they would be toasting in its heat.

Deep in the wood, cowering under the hollowed out root of an old oak tree, was a little hedgehog. He wasn't afraid. After all, the noise sounded happy and not at all frightening. No, he was just confused. Everything was changing so quickly and he didn't understand why. He didn't understand why he felt so cold at night or why the ground felt so hard when he tried to forage for his supper. Even more strangely, all his friends seemed to have disappeared! For weeks beforehand he kept hearing this strange word 'hibernate' being mentioned. Somehow he sensed that he should instinctively know what it meant. But so far the meaning had eluded him.

Darkness fell. All the children had gone home and a sense of stillness and quietness had descended on the wood. The little hedgehog slowly uncurled himself from the ball of sleep that he had fallen into. He pushed his paws forward and like a cat stretched out his tiny limbs. Maybe if he investigated what it was that the children had been doing, he might find the answer to why everything was changing. It took some time because it was a long way to the edge of the woods and he had such little legs.

Finally he reached the edge of the wood. He was always very wary about venturing outside the safety of the wood. Especially after the incident with this enormous, hairy animal with four legs and an extremely wiggly thing at the back, which swooshed rapidly from side to side. If he hadn't instinctively rolled up into a ball when this monster had approached him at speed and sniffed him so hard, he was afraid that he would have been inhaled into the depths of the monster. He shuddered at the memory, but glancing around he could see that the coast was clear.

 Carefully, stopping every now and then to check that he was still alone, made his way in the direction that the children had gone. He found himself in a large clearing in the middle of which was as a mountain of wood that had been created out of the sticks and branches. It rose majestically up to the sky,  and how it didn't fall down was a mystery to the little hedgehog. Very gingerly he edged his way around the mountain. About halfway round he spotted a large gap in the pile. Tentatively he poked his head in. The gap seemed to be bigger on the inside. Feeling a rush of courage he proceeded to enter and found himself in a cosy little nook in this mountain of wood. It was so cosy and warm that he felt very sleepy and thought that he would curl up and have a little nap. After all there was no way that the big hairy monster would be able to get to him, surrounded as he was by all this wood! Little did he realise it, but he had by instinct settled down to await the coming of Spring by hibernating as generations of hedgehogs had done before him.

As he slept on, all the children from the day before arrived with their parents. They were excited and drooling at the thought of the marshmallows. Soon the fire would be lit and the sky would be alive with the explosions of the fireworks carefully guarded by the dads. The air was tense with excitement, yet still the little hedgehog slept on.

Bounding across the opening towards the bonfire leaped the big hairy monster of the little hedgehog's nightmare.It was in fact an old English Sheep dog. Racing around the bonfire he suddenly stopped by the gap where the little hedgehog had entered. He lifted his head and started barking excitedly, swooshing his tail and running up to his master and back again to the hole. "What is it boy? What's got you so worked up?" "Come here boy." But the dog continued to bark and push at the bonfire with the nose that had sniffed the little hedgehog. Eventually just as the the fire was about to be lit, the dog's master reached his gloved hand into the gap and with a look of astonishment on his face pulled out the little hedgehog. Still the little hedgehog slept on. Very gently the master wrapped him up in his scarf and determined to place him safely in a box of straw in his garage, to sleep out the long winter. The big, hairy monster was given the most enormous bone as a reward

Photo courtesy of: http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://a-z-animals.com/media/animals/images/original/old_english_sheepdog2.jpg&imgrefurl=http://a-z-animals.com/animals/old-english-sheepdog/&h=600&w=733&sz=65&tbnid=toCaueS3EpzbEM:&tbnh=126&tbnw=154&zoom=1&usg=__dq4TxCWmOvnumz-AlTdkIoH_xmo=&docid=FWQiDQNAzQT4LM&sa=X&ei=ahV4Ut7ZDauX0QW86oGYCQ&ved=0CD8Q9QEwBg

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Car wars -- a polite notice!

Have you ever been in a situation where you've ended up taking on someone else's pet hate or obsession? I've recently discovered that I have!

We live in what should be a quiet road. The road itself is a dead-end leading to a local church and an old Manor house and farm. Our house is one of a row of terraced cottages which were originally built for the managers and workers of a local blanket factory now demolished with new houses where the factory used to exist. We don't have a garage and the front garden isn't large enough to park a car. This didn't bother us as there seemed to be plenty space on the road outside our house to park. Shortly after moving in we became acquainted with our next door neighbour, an older gentleman who kept 4 retired greyhounds. He was pleasant enough but we soon discovered that he has one main topic of conversation,cars parked in our street that are not owned by any of the residents. He's obsessed by it! He especially gets upset if they dare to park directly in front of his house.

Over the years he's been known to phone the police to report cars as being abandoned or stolen. He's had numerous arguments with the occupants of a rental property around the corner which doesn't have any parking of its own who've parked in our road. He's even reported another neighbour, a policeman, for illegally parking cars for sale on our street. He's constantly harassing the police about it but there's nothing they can do as it's a public highway. On one occasion a policeman told him to park really close to the cars and to persuade the rest of us to do the same so that the drivers would have to knock on the door to ask us to move and let them out. The idea being that we would get the chance to ask them politely to be more considerate of the residents when parking in future. I found this quite amusing and declined to do so. Over the years the whole topic of parking has become a frequent topic of conversation among all the residents of the street.

But gradually over time I've found myself starting to be a bit niggled by this. I've been smitten by the parking virus. It started one day when I came home from shopping and had to park outside one of the houses at the far end of the street. It was raining heavily and I had several bags of shopping to carry from the car to the house. By the time I'd finished I was wet, grumpy and fed up! And so the rot set in. Now if I arrive home and there's someone parked outside my house I glower at the car, constantly checking to see if it's gone yet. I must admit that I've not gone as far as parking so close to the car that they can't get out, but I did once put a 'polite notice' under the windscreen wipers of a car that was parked outside a neighbour's house, without moving, for over a week. In my defence it was the house of an elderly lady who has carers popping in several times a day, plus her daughter who is often laden with her mum's laundry or shopping, she even brings her mum all her meals.

This might sound like a bit of a rant, not to say a bit ridiculous, but this has been going on for several years now. 

So why have I chosen to write this now? For my sanity really! For the past week there's been a car parked outside my house. Every morning when I open my bedroom curtains there it is! I go out for the day and when I come home, it's still there. It's golden frame and vacant eyes mock me every time I look at it sitting there, in my space! Various scenarios have run through my head from acts of vandalism to doing as my neighbour has done in the past and reporting it to the police. I did place a 'polite notice' on it but removed it the next day. In town today I bumped into some neighbours and this car came up in conversation. These neighbours think that it has been abandoned as the driver's door isn't properly closed and it has an air of being dumped. Who knows? Perhaps I'll give it a couple more days and see if it has been reported stolen.

We're not being completely 'unpublic' spirited, (apologies if that's not a word). We realise that sometimes people will need to park here. However, at the end of the row of houses there's a large hedge with plenty of room for several cars to park along side it without inconveniencing anyone and all we ask is that people have some consideration for the residents and park there instead of in front of our houses. Is it too much to ask?