Not a Mid Life Crisis...

I love looking at all the photos and funny sayings that people share on Facebook and Twitter. I've even been known to pinch a few and share them myself; well quite a lot if I'm honest. The one on the left, of someone doing a sky dive, made me laugh as I'm considering doing one next year for a 'significant birthday.' If this is a sign of a 'mid life crisis,' then I've been having one for a few years now. How else to explain my penchant for going paragliding and taking part in flashmobs at my time of life? But if I am, it's certainly fun and I can thoroughly recommend it.



Another thing that I'm now contemplating doing, is getting a tattoo. Another mid life crisis moment, right? Wrong. Having a tattoo is not something I've ever considered before. I thought that I was being very daring having my ears pierced, not once, but twice. But recently I read an article that someone shared on Facebook about a project that was set up in 2013, called The Semi Colon Project. This is a project that has been set up to support people suffering from depression, anxiety or any other form of mental illness.

But why the semi colon? Well to quote the article,

A semicolon represents a sentence the author could have ended, but chose not to. That author is you and the sentence is your life.

Having suffered with clinical depression, not only do I welcome the news that such a project has been set up, I also think the quote is very true and something to be celebrated. Although I personally never got to the point where I tried to end my life, I have known what it's like to feel that life isn't worth living. I've woken up dreading the day, let alone the weeks and months ahead; it's like being surrounded by a cloak of despair that prevents you from seeing anything good or positive in living. I was fortunate in that I had a very supportive husband and two lovely little boys who needed me and this, along with the help of a wonderful counsellor, helped me to fight my way out from under this cloak, or cloud of depression. 

But not everyone is as fortunate. Often even the people who love them struggle to understand. But if they've never experienced it for themselves, you can see why they struggle. That's one of many reasons why I think it's so great that this project has been set up. 

By writing a semicolon on your wrist, you are making a promise to yourself that it is OK to reach out and seek for help… stand up for you or anyone you know who has depression, anxiety, has self harmed or has contemplated suicide and help our peers, our friends and our family know that we speak up for them and that we stand up against Mental Health and the stigma that’s attached to it.

This is another quote from the article. At the moment I am fortunate enough not to need to make this promise to myself. But anyone who has, or has had a mental illness knows, there's no guarantee that it won't happen again. I'm thinking of getting a semi colon tattoo as a reminder to myself of how lucky I am. I'm still working on the book that is my life and hopefully the final chapter is a still a long way off. I certainly have many more adventures that I want to be included in it. 

So no, getting a tattoo wouldn't for me be another 'mid life crisis.' It would be a mark of celebration that I didn't end the sentence; a sign that I chose to go on and continue writing the chapters.

The story's not over yet. Watch this space...

Paragliding photograph courtesy of: https://www.facebook.com/purpleclvr?fref=ts

Thank you photo courtesy of: https://www.facebook.com/Happinessinyourlife?fref=ts

Link to original article.

http://ow.ly/P4FrP

Isabel Johnstone 2015 ©

National Volunteers Week.

Elizabeth, one of our longest-serving volunteers.

The week beginning Monday the first of June is National Volunteer Week. Cogges relies heavily on its volunteers and I thought I'd take this opportunity to write about the roles played by our dedicated team of volunteers.

 I’ve been a volunteer at Cogges since it re-opened in 2011. I work on the welcome desk and also pop in five days a week to feed the three farm cats, Patsy, Bonnie and Clyde. This year I’ve also started doing Downton Abbey tours of the site. Over the past three years I’ve drawn enormous pleasure from my time at Cogges. I’ve met Lynda Bellingham and Alexander Armstrong and even watched a bit of filming of a certain ITV period drama filmed at Cogges. But the best feeling of all, is knowing that I’m helping to keep Cogges alive and well, and helping to preserve it for future generations.

The animal volunteers

There are many varying roles played by our volunteers. From looking after the animals; working in the walled garden or woodland; helping to welcome the visitors; giving tours of the house; and helping with events, such as the popular beer and music festivals. This year we have branched out and now have a team of volunteers who make craft and edible goods, to sell in our gift shop.

Some of the garden volunteers..

Volunteering at Cogges, you never know what you might be asked to do. This time last year I would’ve laughed if you’d told me that I would sometimes be seen chasing chickens and ducks in an effort to put them to bed for the night. But now I love it. Other volunteers have been known to dress up or put on a puppet show.

Puppet show.

Many of our new features, such as the log cabin sand pit and the shelter for the Shetland ponies, have been made by volunteers. We are a mixed bunch, with many differing, but complementary talents.

Fudge making.

I’ve made many new friends through volunteering at Cogges, both with other volunteers and regular visitors. I think it would be fair to say that we are almost like a family.

Working alongside the staff, the volunteers work hard to make sure that our visitors have a lovely time. A recent visitor commented, “It was just heavenly – peaceful, calm, fun, varied, so much to do, all so enjoyable for both the children and the adults. Thanks for creating a great space.”  With comments like this, we must be doing something right.

The sewing team. 

This is just the tip of the iceberg as there are many volunteers who work behind the scenes doing administration, organising and other unseen jobs. But whatever contribution our volunteers make, Cogges wouldn’t be the place it is today without them. I’d like to take this opportunity to say thank to the volunteers for all their hard work and dedication. I’m sure that Colin and Laura will wholeheartedly agree.  

Photos courtesy of Isabel and Cogges.Isabel

The Rotary Club’s Festival of the Fleece

Sophie Grigson, declaring the day open.

On Monday 4^th May, Cogges played host to a special event organised by the Rotary Club of Witney; the Festival of the Fleece. This event was organised in honour of the Rotary’s Diamond Jubilee. The event was free and attracted an estimated 2,500 visitors. In fact, it was so busy that the people organising the barbecue ran out of food by 1.30pm. But worse than this, the bar appeared to run out of beer. Fortunately another barrel was discovered and saved the day. There were activities and events for everyone, including wool weaving, craft stalls, a teddy bears picnic and a cookery master class, by the celebrity chef, Sophie Grigson, to name but a few. Ms Grigson herself cut the ribbon to open the celebrations and the fun began.

Sue Tucker demonstrating her skills.

A host of attractions, stalls and displays recalled Witney’s heritage and links to the wool trade, including a fascinating, vintage film, demonstrating how blankets were made 100 years ago. The wool theme continued, with Sue Tucker, a local artist and one of Cogges’ many volunteers, sitting in the sunshine, demonstrating how to weave using a wooden, table top weaving loom. Those who wanted, could choose their own hand spun and dyed wool and decide for themselves, what they would like it made into. 

Teddy Bears Picnic in the orchard.

Unusually for an English Bank Holiday, the sun shone, adding to everyone’s enjoyment of the day. The teddy bears picnic took place in the peaceful surroundings of the Cogges orchard, although with so many families attending, it didn’t stay peaceful for long. Once everyone had finished their picnics, the children enjoyed activities, such as playing old fashioned games or trying their hand at making sheep masks or a fish on a pole. John, the husband of Sue Tucker, ran a sketching session for children, using an antique spinning wheel. 

Traditional games in the farmyard.

The months of hard work and planning on the part of members of the Rotary Club and Cogges' staff and volunteers, really paid off. Sue Tucker wrote, 'Bathed in sunshine the whole day was delightful, with families and people of all ages , enjoying Cogges at its best.' Indeed , what better venue could have been chosen to celebrate a Festival of the Fleece, than our own Cogges Manor Farm.

Part of Sue's exhibition, Cotswold sheep.

"I will always love you" 2015 Neil Cap.

Cogges is also taking part in the Oxfordshire Art Weeks, which runs until the 25th May. Sue has an exhibition of her craft work in the café and Neil Cap BA (HONS), another volunteer and local sculptor, is also displaying some of his sculptures in the courtyard.

Photographs courtesy of Cogges and Sue Tucker.

When doing nothing is the best action.

Ever struggled, when in a difficult situation, to figure out what's the best thing to do? I know I have. There's been many times when I literally found it hard to, 'see the wood from the trees.' I also found that at times like that, struggling to find the answer, or the way out, only seemed to make things worse.

This morning I decided to wear a necklace my hubby had given me as a present. It's four small rubies surrounding a small diamond, on a fine gold chain. As I mainly wear either pink or purple, I don't wear it very often. When I took it out of its box, the gold chain was all tangled and knotted. At first I tried to untangle it in my hand. I was getting nowhere. Then I remembered that in the past when this has happened, I've found it easier if I laid the chain on a hard, flat surface and use something sharp, like a needle, to gently tease the knot apart. I placed the necklace on a table and fetched a needle out of my sewing box ready to begin.

One of the ways that I'm affected by Lupus is that I have very dry eyes as I don't produce sufficient tears to moisten them. As a result I have to put drops in my eyes several times a day. Rather stupidly, I decided to put some drops in, before trying to untangle the chain. This only served to make the task more difficult, as the drops initially make my vision very blurry. At first I tried to persevere, but instead of untangling the chain, I seemed to be making things worse. Eventually I decided to wait for my vision to clear before trying again. This time I was able to untangle the knot in the chain very easily.

As I fastened the chain around my neck, it struck me that there was a lesson to be learned here.  Some of the situations we find ourselves in can, metaphorically, blur our thinking. When we're stressed, suffering a bereavement or have been hurt by the actions of someone we care about, maybe the best thing to do, is nothing; to let it go and just wait until our emotions are less intense and we're able to think more clearly and rationally.

I have heard this before. but somehow having this practical demonstration seemed to really make it hit home. 

Waiting and doing nothing can be very hard to do, especially if you're in a situation that you desperately want to get out of. But by waiting until the time is right we can save ourselves a lot of unnecessary stress.

Like all of life's lessons, this might not always apply. sometimes the right thing to do is to remove yourself from the situation, and then do nothing for a while. I guess learning what's the right thing to do at any given time is all part of life. But I believe that deep down inside us, we know when we're doing, or not doing , the right thing for us at that time.

I did at one point think of putting the necklace back in the box and wearing something else, but I'm glad I persevered. Next time I can't, 'see the wood for the trees,' I'll think of this necklace and the lesson it taught me and hopefully save myself from some unnecessary stress.


Photos Isabel's own plus,

Letting go a courageous thing.jpg courtesy of:- lessonslearnedinlife.com

Best in Witney

I’ve been a volunteer at Cogges ever since it re-opened to the public on the 17^th June, 2011. I remember the opening day very clearly. It was a typical English Summer day, the rain never stopped. But this didn’t seem to dampen the enthusiasm of the hundreds of people who turned out to support us. There were lots of events going on. I remember that I was given the task of standing beside the enormous head of the Wicker Man. After a five minute briefing on the history of it, I was then expected to answer any questions asked by members of the public. One example of the many challenges I've faced by being a volunteer over the years.

In its former life, the farm had been run as a living museum set in the Victorian era. At that time there were lots of animals such as, sheep, cows, chickens, a horse, rabbits and not forgetting the pigs. The 'new' Cogges didn’t have as many animals and by the end of the first season, the question that I, as a volunteer, remember being asked the most was, “Where are the pigs?” There was a mixed reaction from the public. Some of those who remembered it as it was were disappointed, but others who loved the place, were delighted to see it being used again. Those who’d never been before seemed to fall in love with the place and who could blame them. Where else would you find such a peaceful, idyllic place in the heart of a town?

In 2012, when Cogges once again opened for the season, much to the delight of the visitors, not to mention the relief of the volunteers, we were happy to greet the arrival of some piglets and pygmy goats.

Patsy, one of the farm cats, keeping an eye on things.

Four years later and, thanks to the hard work on the part of the staff and volunteers, Cogges is thriving. Already this year we’ve exceeded visitors numbers from the same time last year. When visitors comment, it is to say how much they have enjoyed their visit. We have a large number of season ticket holders who are regularly to be seen enjoying a drink and a chat in the courtyard area while their children play on the tractor, or down in the woodland in the adventure play area. 

But the public haven’t just shown their support by their continued presence.  They’ve recently taken the time to vote for us in the Best in Witney awards, for which we won in the ‘Most Family Friendly’ category. Not only that, but we were also been nominated for the same category in the Muddy Stilettos award. We didn't win this one,  but we’re still honoured and thrilled to have been nominated.

We still have pigs.

We have a lot more to offer than we did in 2011. Colin and his team of staff and volunteers have worked hard and I'm proud to be part of that team. But a large part of the success of Cogges is down to the members of the public who have, and are still, giving us their wholehearted support. We're very grateful for this and I’d like to take this opportunity to say thank you. We really couldn’t do it without your support.

Photos courtesy of Isabel and Cogges.

Wickerman courtesy of:- 335 x 448 | 53KB juegosinteractivospme.mx

Video courtesy of Oxbox.tv

Brief encounter.

A few years ago, I was on a plane bound for Edinburgh. I was going to attend a reunion with my school friends and was travelling on my own. Sitting next to me was a tall, blond-haired, American gentleman, aged about 40. Shortly after take off, we fell into conversation and what he told me has never left me. In fact, it is probably one of the biggest factors in my deciding to 'get off my backside' and start living.

As we chatted he told me that he was on his way to Gleneagles for a golfing weekend with some friends, also Americans. I remarked that his wife must be very understanding to let him fly all this way, just for the weekend. It was what he said next that has lived with me ever since.

On September 11th, 2001, he was working in one of the Twin Towers when the planes struck. He described to me in detail just what it was like. The noise, the dust, the people screaming and the intense heat. He was lucky. He managed to make his way down the stairs and escaped with very little in the way of injury. 13 of his friends and colleagues weren't so lucky. As you can imagine, this had a profound effect on him. 

He told me that, prior to this disaster, he had been a workaholic. His wife and children hardly ever saw him and even when he wasn't at work, he spent very little time with his kids. But after 9/11 he decided that this had to change. Surviving the disaster when so many of his friends had lost their lives, brought home to him just how fragile and precious life is. It also made him realise what's really important in life and for him that was his family.

He took the decision to give up his career as a financier in New York, and move his family to Vermont. There he set up his own business as an accountant. He finishes work at the same time that his kids finish school in order to spend time with them. He told me about how he takes them skiing in Winter and plays basket ball and other sports with them in Summer. He obviously doesn't earn as much as he did in New York. But he and his family are much happier.

Playing golf at Gleneagles was something that he'd always dreamt of doing and now he was fulfilling that dream.

Little did I realise when I left the house that morning that I would meet someone, if only briefly, who would have such a profound effect on me.

It must have taken a lot of courage for him to completely change his life in this way. The memory of what happened will never leave him. But he told me that he tries to life his life for his friends and colleagues that lost theirs that day. That too must take a lot of courage. 

Life has been a little difficult of late. But remembering that brief encounter has helped me to realise that I've still got a lot to be thankful for.


Photos courtesy of:-

http://lessonslearnedinlife.com/keep-shining/

Isabel Johnstone 2015 ©

Dancing in the rain.

'Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.'

I read this quote on Facebook and fell in love with it. I've now adopted it as my new motto and am trying to put it into practice. My website has the title, 'Sunshine after the rain.'  I called it this as I started writing my blog when I had not long come out of a difficult period in my life. I've been through many of life's 'storms' and have been content in the past just to congratulate myself on having survived.

I'm not quite as old as Meryl Streep, but I have been aware for some time that life is indeed a gift, and a very precious one at that. But life isn't always easy and it can be hard to keep walking, let alone dancing, when things get tough.

One lesson I've have learned over the years is, that worrying doesn't change anything. It's time and energy wasted; time and energy that could be spent learning to 'dance in the rain.' Now don't get me wrong? I don't mean this literally. You won't see me dancing down the street when I'm going through some crisis or if something sad has happened.

The way I interpret this is, instead of dwelling on the negative side of our situation, we should look for the positives. Sometimes that can be hard, or even seem impossible. Little things like being thankful for those around us who are supporting us, can help to bring a smile and make us feel better, if only for a moment. But our lives are made up of moments and I believe that is what it means to embrace life. To try to make every moment count. I haven't always done that in the past.

This is especially relevant for me at the moment. Easter is fast approaching. But for a long time I dreaded this time of year. My daughter was born on Easter Monday. Easter is the time that Christians celebrate Jesus dying, then rising again to give us a new life. My daughter passed away, 17 days later.

People told me that I should try to remember the happy times. For a long time this seemed to me to be an impossible goal. She was so sick and every one of her 17days seemed to bring a new crisis. But now I remember how happy I was when she was born; the feelings of love that overwhelmed me as I sat beside her incubator, singing little songs I made up, just for her. I can even still feel her tiny hand grasping hold of my index finger and that too makes me smile. We didn't have photographs of her without tubes and wires, but a lovely lady drew this from a photograph, and this too makes me smile.

If only I'd been able to do that sooner.

One of my favourite things is a rainbow. They only appear when the sun comes out after it's been raining. Perhaps if we can bring some sunshine into our dark times, even if it's only a tiny flicker, we might make our own beautiful rainbows, out of our stormy times.

Over the past few years I've been learning to embrace life, but now I'm going to try to learn to dance in the rain too. This year I'm not dreading Easter. After all, Life is a gift.

Photos Isabel's own, apart from:-

https://www.facebook.com/AARPIllinois/photos/a.10150193683836312.307388.48774131311/10152448661796312/?type=1&theater

Isabel Johnstone 2015 ©